I’m so stress today. I feel like I almost drowning with workload. Sometimes I feel like I want to lay down and careless about work. Itu semua duniawi je!!

But I’m not gonna talk about work right now. Or how stressful I am. Instead, I’m gonna tell you a story. But before I go on, I would like to remind about 2 things, especially to the people who know me. One, please don’t ask me about this when you meet me. Two, and don’t ask me when this happened. I won’t tell.

Anyway, so let’s hear the story.

Once upon a time, I went to restaurant for take away food. I went there a few time before, but usually with somebody. But this time, I went there alone.

While waiting for my food to be ready, the cashier came to me a few time, and talked to me casually, asking about this and that. May be, he recognized me from my previous visit. So I just answered his questions.

After quite some time, and my food was ready, I went to counter to pay. And the cashier suddenly said,

“Boleh saya mintak nombor awak?” -May I have your number?

I was like… dumb struck. Is this for real? But I didn’t know what to reply. Suddenly, I felt like I need to do this.

“Errr… boleh” -err.. can.

Never occurred to me that I simply giving my number to just anybody, especially when I meet for the first time, and for the occasion like this. But it also never happened that people asking me for my number. Err.. may be. Let’s just I never have it. ~kenapa aku rasa macam ada je, tapi tak ingat pulak..

And I don’t know. I feel like, I should try this. People always say that I never try to open my heart to people. So why not I tried for this time.

To cut it short, he called me that night. And explaining to me that I look somebody he used to know. Apparently I’m not! And we had a conversation, which I found it quite boring.

And he never called me again after that night. Or may be he tried, but I was away from my phone, and when I realized the miss call, I still didn’t intend to call him back.

I don’t know why but I always feel find guys are boring. Especially on phone, andย  for the situation like this. ~okay.. sekarang aku dah ingat, aku pernah bagi nombor kat orang sebelum ni. But with friends, I don’t find guys that way.

So, why I feel it that way? There must be something wrong with me. Why I found it’s interesting in the movie, but not in real life. To say that I’m expecting a fairy tale, frankly speaking, I don’t know what to expect.

Or may be, I’m just expecting a friendly and sincere conversation. Not some lame talk, like have I eat or not, or what I’m doing right now.ย  And sometime I feel boring to explain people about myself. I mean like, where I come from, what I do I do for living and etc.

So I’m open this for discussion. ~If you find it interesting to discuss. What should I do? How can I have a relationship, when I always feel like this? Guys, do have any suggestion?

Regards,

~Ha~